There is no doubt that, even in the most compatible relationships, the partners will have to compromise on many things and on multiple levels. At first, it may seem like this is not hard to do, as the couple is going through the so-called “honeymoon phase”, but once this phase is over, personal space becomes a crucial part of a relationship.
What Makes Personal Space So Important?
In the partners’ passionate and honest effort to learn as much as they can about each other better, to bond and to get along, it is easy for them to get carried away and go so far as to lose themselves and the things that define them as individuals in the process.
This is how toxic relationships start, however. When the partners spend all their waking time together, it can become easy to develop an interdependent kind of relationship where partners lose the will to do things individually and merge into one.
Moreover, they slowly lose their unique traits, thus tiring each other and losing their spark. The fact that we are not the same as our partners is usually a good thing, not a negative thing. As we know, opposites attract.
So, if you like horror films and she is into rom-coms, you should be free to watch the kind of films you like separately. Likewise, if she likes yoga and you like handball, there is no reason why you should train together.
What is more, our friends are not always compatible with our partners. In such cases, it neither right to force them to hang out together constantly, nor is it justified to stop seeing them altogether. There is a middle path: seeing them alone.
We Shouldn’t Be Afraid Of Asking For Personal Space
When you start to feel like you are merging into one single person – you do everything together, share the same friends and experiences 24/7, it may be time to take a breath. When you feel this need, don’t let yourself go on a guilt trip, you’re doing nothing wrong. Wanting and needing your personal space is perfectly alright.
In actual fact, unless you speak out and ask for what you need in a firm and honest way, you will soon feel resentment, bitterness and a deep feeling of dissatisfaction with your relationship, which may even result in breaking up.
So, it is best to value your freedom and individuality, as well as your partner’s, and allow each other time to breathe and to pursue your own thing, maintaining your personality and what made you fall in love with each other in the first place.