When you’re in a relationship, especially a long-term one, it is easy to get caught up in the day-to-day reality of it and mistake some of the most unacceptable behaviors for things that are justifiable. However, AnastasiaDate is going to describe some of the feelings whose presence you shouldn’t accept in your relationship.
AnastasiaDate: Feeling This In Your Relationship Spells Bad News
We’ve all felt dubious about whether something that’s bothering is a legit reason to end a relationship, fearing that we may be making a fuss about something trivial, a case of storm in a teacup. There are things you can put up with, even improve, in your relationship; and then there are others you just shouldn’t tolerate.
#1. Feeling like the relationship demands too much of you
If your relationship is too much work and you feel like nothing is natural and like you need to constantly walk on eggshells, then it’s probably not worth keeping. As Barbara Pender, host of 56 LIVESTREAMS of RealLife confession of Online Dating platforms told Bustle: “a relationship should not feel like work; that is a clue that your communication is off or that one of you did not listen to what you agreed to in order to move past that subject”.
#2. Feeling under stress
A relationship should be a happy place, a situation wherein we feel calm and satisfied, even when things aren’t exactly rosy. If yours is filling you with too much worry or apprehension, it may be a sign you are with the wrong person and emotional abuse may be present without you realizing it.
#3. Feeling like you’re the one making all the effort
In other words, if you’re feeling that the relationship is one-sided, it is probably because the other half of it is not bothering to keep things going enough. For example, if you’re the only one trying to create a romantic atmosphere, or if you’re the one addressing all the major issues while she’s whistling indifferently, it could be a sign she’s not taking you or the relationship seriously.
#4. Feeling like sex is forced
Not a laughing matter at all. If your and your partner’s sexual desires aren’t synchronized and you’re just doing it because you feel like you ‘should’, then there’s something very wrong with your chemistry and your communication. Sex is an integral part of adult romantic relationships and it should be one the fun parts of it, not a chore.
#5. Feeling deceived
Are you under the impression that your partner could be lying to you consistently? Does she make promises she never keeps, does she often deny having said things you’re sure she has said? It doesn’t have to go as far as gaslighting, any form of deception is despicable and intolerable. If you’re sure she’s tricking you, make a run for it, don’t waste any more time.
#6. Feeling criticized over everything
Yes, we grow and we want to get better in our relationships; and part of that may involve respectfully correcting some of our partner’s flaws from time to time, but constant criticism is not a sign of a healthy relationship. Dr. Fran Walfish, leading couples relationship, and family psychologist tells Bustle: “Disputing or correcting someone on points irrelevant to the main point being discussed,” is a key feature, and “the constant correcting keeps the abuser on top and his subject in a one-down position.”
At AnastasiaDate, we believe that love has no boundaries, but people should have limits. If you feel like you haven’t set yours, or that they have been encroached on to the point where you’re experiencing one or more of the above, you need to consider whether being with that person is reason enough to condemn yourself to an unhappy personal life.